Last Friday the Dumb Family was invited to the Great Wolf Lodge in Williamsburg, Virginia.*
We’d never been to the lodge before because it is a little out of our virtually non-existence holiday traveling budget so we were so, super excited about going.
I mean, it’s an indoor water park resort place of fan-freakin-tastic wall-to-wall fun!
With an arcade. And a sweet shop. And awesomeness.
Naturally, this Dumb Family would be right at home.
After we got there.
Because the place is three and a half hours from our house .
Three and a half hours with two constantly warring boys (one of us has been known to provide a car-puking good time) and their loud-talking-perpetually-hungry-and-thirsty-two-year-old brother.
Sounds like a blast, right?!
Wrong (please note photographic evidence of rebellious 2 year old refusing to sit on the couch for a photo because that’s just how he rolls).
But, in spite of the Honda Pilot shaped torture chamber we took down to Williamsburg, the trip turned out to be as awesomely amazing as we’d hoped it would be, making the three and a half hours of ugly nearly, sorta, kinda, maybe worth it.
Almost.
Naturally, a Dumb Mom’s Guide is in order!
How about, Dumb Mom’s Guide to Enjoying Historical Williamsburg with Three Dudes who Think History is Boring and Dumb**
1. Stay at Great Wolf Lodge (that’s the edible version of it below).
Like I explained yesterday and above, the place is magic. MAGIC! Like the good kind that makes people happy and smiley and chubby through the middle.
2. Go during the holidays. It’s a freaking winter wonderland down there (or up there if you happen to live further into The South than Virginia). With chestnuts and open fires and other cliché-corny-happy-making holiday type junk. Great Wolf Lodge does this cool Snowland theme every year with a singing bear show (or was it a wolf show?!) and indoor snow. And they have a huge tree in the lobby that is magnificent. But the fun doesn’t stop at the lodge. Colonial Williamsburg is all Christmasy and bright too!
3. Check out the town. It’s like being in Ye Old England. At least that’s what I gathered as we cruised through without actually buying the $36 Colonial Williamsburg admission passes. I mean it looked interesting and awesome and all, but we are cheap it’s the holidays and we didn’t have $100 just to torture The Dudes with history. Even if we could count on #3 to liven things up with a tongue shot!
4. Teach your kids what happens when they are naughty.
I can see why the stockades worked, you know. So uncomfortable and embarrassing. I wonder if you can get one on eBay? So I can install it on my front yard?!
5. Have fun! I find that it’s super easy to have fun when The Dudes are not annoying me genuinely enjoying themselves. They have less time to pick at each other and fight over stuff that’s dumb. Williamsburg has plenty of diversions kids will love to make it pretty much impossible for them to drive you batty. And, with all the fun to be had, sound sleeping will occur naturally!
The one warning I will give you is to be prepared to spend some mullah! Williamsburg, like many other American tourist areas, is a money vacuum. Before you know it you’re at the Yankee Candle’s Flagship store (which is pretty dang cool too) blowing your stash on tree ornaments and hand dipped candles!
Fun? Perhaps.
Expensive? You betcha!
But, not for people who win $250 from me!
But, you can’t do that if you don’t come back by tomorrow and enter my $250 Bright Smiles, Bright Holidays photo contest with Invisalign Teen.
Tomorrow is the absolute last day to get in on the fun so consider adding the disclaimer to your smiley, holiday-ish Wordful Wednesday post and linking up to the contest AND Wordful Wednesday.
Two birds. One stone.
Easy. Fun. Awesome.
*If you know me at all, you know that invited is a nice way to say they paid for it.
**Actually, thanks to Dumb Dad’s unnatural obsession with things that happened a ridiculously long time ago, in American in particular, #1 has become quite the history buff himself. Only, since we were too cheap to pay for the full experience, he joined is brothers in the “this is boring and dumb” department.
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That looks cold. The Williams family really doesn’t do cold. But I’m glad that y’all had a good time.
Neither does The Dumb Family. We’re from California for crying out loud. Cold weather is our cryptonite! But, it’s a hazard we face living in this effed up part of the country. Not to say I’d ever consider moving to Texas or anything, but you know some place slightly more mild and perfect would be great:)
We went to a similar park over Thanksgiving and it was really steep in our pocket book. But, really worth it!
Looks like fun. I need a stockade for my front yard too.
And I love the first photo of your rebellious 2 year old.
I remember those wonderful (not) long rides in a car with bored kids. Do you still have hair left on your head? Otherwise a neat place to go! I know hubby would love it anyway, LOL! definitely, every mom needs a stockade for mischievous kids!
Faaaaaantastic pictures. It looks like you all had a wonderful time, cold or not.
We went to GWL last weekend, too! It was a blast (and we managed to not buy any of the really expensive stuff at the hotel, except breakfast Sunday morning…and you better not tell me yours was included).
But, my kids certainly didn’t sleep like your little angel in the bunk beds. One fell out of the top while trying to climb down, and the other was up until 11:30!!
And, no it’s not in our budget, or travel either. It was 4 hours from our house…and we went Saturday and got home Sunday!
We keep saying we are going to go to Williamsburg. The lodge is a good idea. My husband is the boring, passive aggressive history guy. A little colonial history is good, but he will go really slow and read every teeny weeny sign and stop and make the kids listen to the history of the toenail clipper until they are refusing to sit on couches and begging to be put in the stocks.
That last picture was totally worth the money spent on the trip! I’ve been there when I was a kid and found the place uber boring. . . you’ve made the experience magical and fun for your boys, and that’s just awesome. Now I want to go back!
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