Make New ifriends Monday. Adventures in Extreme Parenthood.

Last week I was pumped to discover that The Fat Boys (along with each of the group’s individual members and their agent, which is a little weird) is following me on Twitter!

Now, I can’t pretend to be as elated as I would be if I discovered that @jtimberlake was following me, but still I’m not even remotely sure why unless The Fat Boys sponsor bloggers to go to conferences or something awesome like that pretty freakin’ excited.

While we all know that @princemarkiedee and @koolrockski are like F list celebrities now (they are staging a Fat Boys comeback I guess), there was a time in old school rap history that these dudes were pretty awesome in the hip hop arena.

I mean they were like the inventors of beat boxing (okay not really, Dougie Fresh says he invented it, others say he too was pretty much just the beat boxing version of Columbus, helping to make an already developed concept into what it is today)!

But most important to me is that theirs was the very first rap tape I bought.

Ever.

So.  In honor of my favorite fat homeboys (one of which is not really all that fat these days), I bring you Dumb Mom’s “ifriends are Back” to introduce ma gurl, kickin’ it Old Skool, Sunday from Adventures in Extreme Parenthood!

The ifriends are back

And you know they could never be wack

The ifriends are back-back

I’m bloggin’.  I’m in the mood.

So leave a comment, but don’t be rude!

Say something nice, and very soon

I’ll drop by your blog and leave some too.

And for a reason I can reveal,

I love Sunday ‘cause she keeps it real.

She’s not the type, to stuff her face,

but when she does I know it’s ‘cause I’m in the place.

Huuur-rah (not actually in the song itself, bad added by me for old skool rap authenticity and general awesomeness)!

And, I could go on for days here because I’m pretty sure I was born to be a rapper and I don’t care what Dumb Dad says about my skills, I know I’m funky fresh and he’s just a hater but, for those of you lacking a healthy appreciation for old school rap, I’ll let you get on to what you really came for: So NOT Dumb Summer Survival Tips from Sunday…

I am damn near humbled to my core that Dumb Mom asked me to guest post for her on the subject of how to survive the summer with kids. Mostly because I don’t have a clue how I or any other stay-at-home mother does it without booking herself a permanent room at the nearest mental facility.  Come to think of it, that would be the closest I would get to taking a vacation.  Clearly beggars cannot be choosers.

There are a number of things that make my summer time sanity goal a bit more challenging than most.  My two boys, “The Trouble Brothers”, are both on the severe end of the autism spectrum.  This means that the classic family summer vacations are not possible for our family.  However, playdates and everyday trips to the grocery store or Target can be done but require intricate planning similar to the staging of a military coup.

So, what wisdom does this mother of two special needs children have for surviving the long summer months?

Don’t try to do it all alone

Ideally this is your spouse or a close friend who loves you and your children for who they are, right where they are.  They are your soft place to fall when you are overwhelmed, lonely, and just need to talk or cry.  They are also the one who will see you getting ready to celebrate your very own pity party and put a stop to it by making you laugh, bringing over lunch from your favorite restaurant or offering to watch the kids for awhile so you can get a break. Thankfully I am blessed with a two people who fit this description in my life.  My husband and my best friend, Becky.

You’ll drive yourself crazy if you focus on what everyone else is doing

When you are a family with a one or more special needs children it is very easy to dwell on what everyone else around you is doing and where they are going. In fact this is true of many families who have normal kids and are simply strapped for cash. So while it seems like everyone around me is taking a week-long trip to the beach, a vacation to Walt Disney World, or a special couples-only trip to somewhere exotic I know that its just not true. Most of us are making due with what fun we can have at home with our friends and family here to enjoy it alongside us. And truly, that can be pretty damn awesome.

Spend the day doing what your children love

My boys are both polar opposites.  One is verbal, the other not so much.  One has excellent fine motor skills and loves to color and draw while the other can hardly hold a pencil and draw a line.  However, they both have a love of water and so as often as we can we go swimming.  Sometimes I will buy one of those small balloon tanks and blow up a dozen or more balloons and watch Noah smile so big I think my heart could burst.  Other days I turn on dance music and Sam and I boogie down and compare dance moves (his are far superior to mine).  It is amazing how well behaved your child can be when they are having fun.

Network with other moms in the same boat

Some mothers join support groups that center around their child’s disability.  I prefer to tweet and meet local moms like myself who are raising children on the autism spectrum.  We get together for swimming playdates, visit local playgrounds, take our kids to the local Chick-Fil-A playplace, or just go to each others homes and sip iced coffee while the kids completely obliterate the house. Honestly we could care less what we do just so long as we do it together.  I live for the days when I get to spend it with some of the greatest people I would never have met if it had not been for my children’s diagnosis.

Remember, “This too shall pass”

When you have an all-around craptastic day where it seems like everything that could have gone wrong did just that, chalk it up as a learning experience and start fresh the next day. Many a night after a particularly troubling day with the Trouble Brothers I put them to bed and then pour myself a nice glass of Cabernet and reflect on what went wrong and how I can keep it from happening again the next day.  But some days, I just say “screw it” and say a little prayer for an easier day tomorrow and daydream about the day when school starts again.  A meager 35 days from today. Not that I’m counting or anything.

Want to see where Sunday kicks knowledge everyday

Tagged as: adventures in extreme parenthood, BList blogger, guest blogger, ifriend